Dr. Joel Kaplan Compact Prostate Massager

Calexotics kindly provided the Dr Joel Kaplan Compact Prostate Massager for me to review, and I am looking to share my thoughts with you in a way that words just don’t quite express. I’m thinking a video would be more appropriate but for some reason my webcam isn’t working too well as the moment.

Materials

As with many of the Calexotics toys that I have reviewed, the toys are manufactured from Acrylonitrile Butadiene Styrene (ABS) with a polyurethane (PU) coating, and a Thermoplastic rubber (TPR) button, or at least that is what I can discern from the packaging and the Calexotics website. All of these are considered to be hypoallergenic and phthalate free, however the TPR is mildly porous and will hold retain smells. So don’t expect a smell free toy after use, especially without a condom.

Lubricants

As all of these materials are safe for use with silicone lubricant, both water-based and silicone-based lubricants can be used safely with this prostate massager. In my experience, anything used anally is best used with a silicone-based lubricant.

Thoughts

My first thoughts were that the shape of the toy won’t work with the shape of everybody’s body, and it certainly wasn’t going to work with my body. Not only was that the case with my body, it didn’t work well with my wife’s body either. (Yes we know that it is designed for men, but we wanted to see how it worked for women as well.)

The rigidity of the massager allows for easy insertion, unlike some of the other anal toys that I have used that were more flexible. However the rigidity also limits the position that the massager will also sit. Being a slightly larger man, I found that the massager didn’t quite sit as I think it is intended. It didn’t seem to sit flush against my perineum as I believe it is supposed to do.

The vibrations outside the body felt strong, but not overly strong. My experience is only with butt plugs, and none of our butt plugs vibrate, so I didn’t know what to expect with a vibrating anal toy. The vibrations from the prostate massager were strong enough to be felt, but I didn’t find they were directed enough. If I moved to some positions, they disappeared altogether, except as my anus where the toy penetrated me. I didn’t really feel the prostate massager pressing against my prostate, I don’t think it is angled enough to hit mine.

Overall

The Dr Joel Kaplan Compact Prostate Massager indeed does vibrate, and is easily insertable, something which is new to me when it comes to anal toys. The vibrations were strong enough to be felt, but I didn’t find them directed towards my prostate as I think they were intended. Overally I believe it is a average toy.

Posh Silicone Performance Kit

Calexotics kindly provided the Posh Silicone Performance Kit for us to review, and I am looking to share my thoughts with you in a way that words just don’t quite express.

Materials

Silicone is considered to be hypoallergenic and phthalate free. Silicone is considered one of the safest sex toy materials, however it still retains smells after use. So don’t expect a smell free toy after use, especially without a condom.

Lubricants

As with all silicone toys, it is advisable to avoid using silicone based lubricants. I personally recommend Astroglide lubricants as they are not only safe for use with the Performance Kit, but are also high quality themselves.

Thoughts

The three different sized cock rings make this toy suitable for most couples without having to try finding a cock ring to suit the male of the relationship. Being an average sized male I found the middle sized ring to be the best size for me. I am yet to try out, but I’m wondering if the largest ring would fit over my cock and balls and sit right at the base of my cock. Will have to try that out soon.

The butt plug is solid enough to feel it within my ass, but also soft enough to not be uncomfortable and press on areas that have been prodded by other more solid toys. The large base actually sits on my bum cheeks rather then deep in my butt crack. The length between the base and the narrowest portion of the butt plug is just enough to allow me to sit down, but walking around leads to some movement of the plug out of my ass. If I had a less plump ass, maybe it would stay inside me while walking around.

Overall

The Posh Silicone Performance Kit didn’t really enhance my performance above anything I regularly experience with other cock rings and butt plugs. Being a supple butt plug, yet solid enough to allow easy insertion makes this a toy almost perfect. The only flaw with the toy is the large round base which I would prefer to be more ‘T’ shaped to sit between my bum cheeks.

The cock rings feel good, and I would consider the Posh Silicone Performance Kit an above average toy, but definitely not perfect.

Fun Factory LAYAspot

Oh, LAYAspot. I had wanted to fall in love with you so badly. Your curves hug perfectly against my public bone and clit, your controls are easy to work, and the fact that you come in tons of pretty colour combinations? Awesomeness. I thought we were meant to be. But there’s just one thing. A tiny problem, honestly, I almost feel embarrassed bringing it up. You’re not enough of a vibe for me. It’s not you, LAYAspot, it’s totally me. My clit just needs a bit more oomph from my toys, and sadly, you didn’t deliver. We can still be friends, though! Really!

The LAYAspot is a vibrator with a great concept from Fun Factory. It’s a small (4″ long, and 3″ wide) and ergonomically shaped external vibe that is curved to rest against your vulva and clit, and can be used during sex as well as for masturbation. It runs off two AAA batteries, and is made of Elastomed. You can use either silicone or water based lubes with it without harming your toy. The packaging says the Layaspot is ‘splashproof’, but I don’t feel comfortable dropping it into the sink, so for clean up I use either toy cleaning wipes or just a regular soap-y towel, then rinse it off carefully, avoiding the cap area. The buttons do tend to collect lube and come in the indentations, so you will need to use your nails or maybe a toothbrush to clean them out.

The controls are fairly simple, two buttons on the top with ‘+’ and ‘-’ signs. As expected, the ‘+’ sign needs to be held down to turn the vibe on, and then both buttons can be used to cycle through the different modes of vibrations and intensities. I found the vibrations to be a lots more ‘buzzy’ than ‘rumbly’, and even on the strongest setting, they weren’t quite what I needed.

I’ve tried using it during sex, (missionary and doggy style) and while while it was great to have vibrations against my clit/something to grind against, again, it just wasn’t enough to get me off by itself. The one time I managed to orgasm while using the LAYAspot, I was rubbing it against my clit with almost enough pressure to hurt, and not in a fun way. Definitely not an experience I care to repeat every time I feel like a quick orgasm. From what I’ve read, there may be some variation in the strength of the LAYAspot’s vibrations from batch to batch, so it could be that I just had one that wasn’t quite as awesome as it could have been.

*sighs* LAYAspot, darling. It’s not you, it’s me. And I promise it won’t be awkward when you see me with other toys. Hey, maybe you, me, and my Hiatchi can all go out and have a drink sometime?

Fun Factory Teneo Uno

I have to admit, I got these as more of a teasing sex toy than for their exercise purposes, and my review is going to reflect that fact.

And it’s even in the same colours as I have.

I purchased the Teneo Uno about two months ago, so can’t really comment on the packaging, but I do remember that it was Fun Factory’s normal shiny silver and red, and it came with a little packet of Toyfluid lube. Toyfluid is a water based lube, so totally safe to use with your silicone toys. However, it does have Glycerine in it, so if you have a sensitivity, best avoid! The official site has lots of different color options for the Uno now as well. I’m actually tempted to get a purple one!

The Teneo Uno is an elastomed ball that has been coated with silicone. the ball is about 1-1/2”, and the cord is 3-1/3″. T The ball is very easy to insert and even has a hollow at the top for your finger! I am normally a bit wet, so I rarely have to use lube with the Teno, but women who are not as *ahem* damp as myself might want to use a bit of water based lube. The little ridges weren’t rough and didn’t catch as I inserted them, but once they were inside…*purrs* It made it a lot easier to clench down on, and definitely motivated me to do um..Kegels. Yeah. Totally was doing Kegels. Wanking had nothing to do with this very scientific review. I’m terribly proper.

I wore it for most of an eight hour shift at the bakery, and it was definitely noticeable shifting inside me (and made my shift so much more enjoyable!). I am on my feet constantly, lifting, bending, and by the time they let me have my first break, I was a very horny kitty. I snuck out to my friend’s car to enjoy my break and some alone time. There was a layer of thick white come all over the toy, and it ended up all over my panties as I pulled it out. Oops? Next time I know to have a towel handy. Luckily clean up (for the toy, at least!) is easy. You can just toss it in the sink and clean it with antibacterial soap and water or toy cleaner if you prefer.

To sum it up:
+ silicone, so able to be completely sterilized
+ easy to use/insert
+ feels amazing and is a good way to ensure you do your Kegels
– the ridges and cracks take a bit more cleaning than a smooth toy would
– the size may be a bit small for some women, luckily Fun Factory also sells the Teneo Duo. 🙂
– I worry about the retrieval cord snapping if I tug on it too hard.

Edited November 8, 2010 to add: I broke the cord while trying to pull the toy out of me a few days ago, so am taking two points off my score. It’s less pretty with a broken cord and much harder to remove. 🙁

Tantus Rascal

The Tantus Rascal is a gorgeous silicone dildo that really delivers on girth and texture! He arrived on my doorstep a few days ago from Tantus, in a discreet brown box. The packaging inside was a clear plastic bag with the Tantus logo on it, as well as free stickers. I plan on giving them out to friends who need to be converted to the world of good quality toys.

Tantus’ toys are 100% Ultra-Premium Platinum Silicone which is hypoallergenic, hygienic, odorless, tasteless, phthalate free, and all around awesome. The silicone is firm with very little give, and it’s finish is matte and has some drag to it, so you may need to use a bit of lube. Plus, lube with the ribbed texture is never a bad idea, as feeling like someone has used a grater on your insides is rarely good! Because this is a silicone toy, be careful to use only water based lubes with it. Silicone lubes can react badly with silicone toys, and having a melted Rascal will just ruin your day. You can clean your Rascal by boiling him, putting him through the dishwasher (on the top rack, please!), or tossing him in the sink with either toy cleaner, or antibacterial soap and water.

The Rascal is a girthy wee beastie, at 1 3/4 ” diameter, and 5″ of insertable length. That’s a lot of toy, and you may find that you need to warm up with a slightly smaller toy before taking Rascal on. The shaft curves slightly, perfect for G-Spot play, and the short length ensures that your cervix isn’t going to get battered during more ‘enthusiastic’ thrusting. The base is flared, so it’s harness compatible, although I am not sure how well it would work, given that he’s a rather short toy. There’s a cavity in the bottom of the toy for a bullet, and my Rascal came with a fairly basic one touch bullet that is fairly strong. The vibrations carry well through the silicone, and reach all the way to the tip.

And now for the part you’ve all been waiting for: what he’s like in use. 😉 The ridges are probably my favourite thing about Rascal-they’re the perfect tease. Running the ridges over my clit and outer labia feels really good, and when you add the vibrations, I’m in heaven! The texture is also really noticeable when I’m thrusting with it as well, but as I mentioned earlier, if there’s enough lube, it’s never an annoying thing. The base is easy to hold for thrusting, but I’ve found my favourite way to use the Rascal is to have it in me while sitting or lying down and use the Hitachi on my clit. Best. Orgasms. Ever. The ribs give me something to clench on, and it makes my orgasm just that much more intense.

To sum it up:
+ silicone, so able to be completely sterilized
+ girthy, so gives you that awesome full feeling
+ shorter length
+ texture!
+ harness compatible
– the girth may be too much for someone who isn’t a bit of a size queen
– texture, if it isn’t something you enjoy

I give it four paws up out of five!

Erolution Super Fckr

We’d never heard of the Erolution Super Fckr+ nor did we expect it to arrive so when we opened the package we were shocked but also extremely impressed on first inspection of this product. Keep in mind you can find the best sex toys for men reviewed here: http://www.topmalesexmachine.com/.

Design / Shape / Size

On first glance we actually thought the black section of this masturbator was a hard material but the entire product is actually made from a unique Feelsoft™ material. This allows the user of the Super Fckr+ to squeeze the product to give a tighter experience (more on this later in the review).

The Feelsoft™ material is extremely soft and very lifelike to a point that it’s one of the most realistic feeling to the touch male masturbators we have ever tried.

The vagina on this masturbator is exceptionally well designed and very detailed, it looks as though it has been molded from a real vagina as the lips are not symmetrical like most real vaginas. Without having to spread the lips apart we can see the entrance hole which is about average sized for a masturbator and stretches very easily which would allow it to accommodate very girthy penises without an issue.

The masturbator is around 7 inches in length which will accommodate most average penis lengths, it does have a hole at the base which allows a penis to pop out if you are more well endowed. This hole also helps with cleaning which we will go into further in the cleaning section.

The inside of the masturbator is wide so it does not feel tight when using it and probably wouldn’t feel tight for even wider penises. The texture is quite interesting as it has very large ridges inside that, when thrusting, are very obvious and makes the experience with the Super Fckr+ not very realistic. This is a shame as the material feels very realistic and without the ridges we feel the masturbator would have fared better in getting a realistic feel. The ridges do feel stimulating however, not overly but enough to create orgasms.

This male masturbator allows the user to put pressure of the shaft whilst thrusting thanks to its flexibility which we thought would help with the lack of tightness but it only slightly helps and we end up giving up trying to make a tighter feel.

The Super Fckr+ is very noisy and can be heard very easily through a closed-door so using the toy secretly in a shared house would be an issue. The noises are very slurpy and if heard by other people they would be very curious of the noise (if not already know what it is).

This masturbator does have an odor and not a particularly nice one, which did transfer onto our hands when we held it when first received but this smell does dissipate in time after a few washes. The Super Fckr+ is quite heavy for its size, but not overly so to be an issue when using to cause wrist or arm strain.

As with most realistic feeling masturbators it is extremely important to only use water based lubricant as other lubricants could damage the material of this toy.

Packaging

The packaging of Erolution Super Fckr+ is simply excellent. The outer box is minimalist but informative and has a definite guys gadget feeling to it. Inside you have a lovely black Erolution branded presentation box with a lift off lid that holds the masturbator inside.

Underneath the masturbator holds the instruction/information manual that tells you how to use, clean, and shows you other products in the range. There is a great looking silver drawstring pouch also that keeps the Super Fckr+ safe from the elements.

Cleaning

Cleaning the Super Fckr+ is quite easy for a male masturbator but it has the common masturbator issue of not being able to access the internal sleeve to make sure the product is completely clean. We found the best way to clean is as described in the instruction manual which is to wash it with antibacterial soap and water then lightly pat dry and then to leave out to air dry completely.

To maintain the softness of the Super Fckr+ the manual suggests using talc which we would suggest everyone use or maybe some cornstarch/cornflour as without doing this the material may go tacky.

His Experience
“With a generous amount of water based lube penetrating the Super Fckr+ is very easy thanks to the wide entrance. The material does feel very realistic but the ridges seem very unrealistic which does detract from the experience. The ridges do provide a little extra stimulation but I would have preferred them to be less pronounced or none at all.

I prefer my masturbators to be tight and this masturbator is far from it so I can struggle orgasming with this product but I do get there with some perseverance. The Erolution range has a product called the Tight Fckr which is described in the manual as mega tight which probably would be better suited to me.”

Her Experience
“I was shocked by how realistic this toy looks and feels to the touch. The packaging of this toy is gorgeous especially the presentation box. The included drawstring bag is the best I’ve seen that has been included with any toy we have received, the quality is simply amazing. The noise when we use this toy is a bit loud for my liking and did make a giggle a little.

It’s good to see a masturbator that is designed to fit an entire average length penis inside. I like to see Steve penetrate a toy fully without popping out the other end so this product has a definite thumbs up from me for that.”

Overall Opinion of the Erolution Super Fckr+
We can see a lot of people liking this product if they are not into tight masturbators as it’s very realistic feeling (except the ridges).Unfortunately for us however we prefer much tighter masturbators and less pronounced stimulators. We would recommend this toy to people who dislike tight masturbators and like highly pronounced ridgid masturbators.

Pros of the Erolution Super Fckr+
– Realistic feeling material
– Long enough to take a full length average penis
– Amazing packaging

Cons of the Erolution Super Fckr+
– Not tight enough
– Ridges are a bit extreme

Soju Sugar Drop-Sexiest

The Soju Sugar Drop is a sexy piece of silicone, and I don’t say that to all my toys. It’s got a modern shape that reminds me of a ray gun, and even comes with a clear acrylic stand, should you feel like leaving your toy out on display. The Sugar Drop has 5 fabulous colour choices (including LIME GREEN!), and is 100% Silicone. Cleaning is the usual hassle free option wiping it down with soap and water or a toy cleaner. Sterilizing can be achieved by boiling it, wiping it down with a 10% bleach solution. Remember to only use water based lubes, or your Sugar Drop can melt! (Well, maybe not melt exactly, but silicone toys can have adverse reactions to silicone lubes, so I wouldn’t risk it.)

The Sugar Drop has a gently rounded point on one end, widening gently to a thick point in the middle, then tapering off to a flat handle at the other end. It’s 8 1/2″ long from end to end, with a 6 1/2″ inch insertable length. At the widest point in the middle of the insertable portion, it has a diameter of 1 5/8″, so you may want to give it a pass if you prefer your toys to be on the slender side. I Unlike the Lelo Ella, the flattened end is not for insertion. I’ve read that some reviewers have been able to insert both ends and got good g-spot stimulation with the flat end, but it’s not something that worked well with my internal anatomy. The angles were wrong and I found the edges of the handle part of the to be irritating, as they felt almost sharp upon insertion! There’s also a seam down the middle of the toy, which can’t be felt in use, but is definitely visible.

When it comes to use, the Sugar Drop isn’t quite what I was hoping for. It does rub against my G-spot when I thrust with it, but it’s more of a tease than the firm pressure I need to squirt. The bubble texture on the side of the shaft is also not what I had expected! In the pictures on Edens Fantasies, they seem like a cute accent, but in use, they are irritating to the point that I need to use tons of lube with it (and I never use lube for vaginal toy use, given how naturally wet I am). They rub against my labia and my inner walls, and it goes from ‘Ooh, yay, a bit of texture.’ to ‘Oh gods, oh gods, it feels like sandpaper.’ very quickly. The handle does works well with a partner, although it’s not long enough to make sure that they won’t get come all over their hands, so gloves might be a good idea if the person you’re using the Sugar Drop on isn’t fluid bonded with you.

I had hoped to like the Sugar Drop a lot more than I did, however, the wonky texture and lack of G-spot stimulation just doesn’t do it for me. It’s been sitting mostly unloved in my toy box the last few months, and while I occasionally take it out and try again, I’m considering passing it on to one of my pay partners. Sorry, Sugar! You’re just not the one for me.

Shunga exotic massage oil-Fuzzy Peaches

Shunga exotic massage oil by Shunga Erotic Art is a brilliant sensual product. I’m an amateur masseuse, and this is definitely one of the better oils I have managed to get my paws on! It currently comes in nine different scents, however my review is on the Peach.

The peach scent is very sweet, almost candy-like, but not sickeningly so. It reminds me of Fuzzy Peaches with a very light floral undertone. After a few minutes, the sweetness dies down and it becomes much more faint and subtle. You almost have to have your nose against the skin to smell it at all ten minute after application, which is a good thing, as my Sir apparently doesn’t appreciate smelling like candy! There’s no aftertaste to the oil either, so licking over the areas you’ve just massaged is still on the menu.

The bottle is clear with a black flip-up top, and the front has an erotic Nishiki-e (gorgeous style of Asian woodcut printing) print of a couple having sex, with the woman seated in the man’s lap. I think the bottle would probably not raise any eyebrows if someone gave it a quick glance, but if they picked it up to get a better look at the picture it could make for an awkward conversation. I would suggest keeping it tucked away from visiting relatives or friends! The lid seems to hold up well and hasn’t leaked in my toy box, but if you were traveling with it, I would probably put it in a plastic bag just to be safe. The back of the bottle has a quick description of the oil in multiple languages as well as the ingredients, which are: Sweet Almond Oil, Grape Seed Oil, Sesame Oil, Avocado Oil, Safflower Oil, Vitamin E, Ylang Ylang, Fragrance. You get 8 oz. of product, and even with the half dozen or so massages I have given since I got it, there’s still more than 3/4ths of a bottle left, so it’s a very generous size.

The consistency is just about perfect. It’s not too thick or gloopy and it’s not overly watery. I usually pour out a palm full (a highly technical measurement, I know) and rub it between my hands to warm it before pouring it onto my partner’s back. I found that it didn’t leave skin feeling overly greasy during the massage, it just enhanced sensations and reduced the drag of my hands. I also didn’t need to keep constantly re-applying the oil during the massages, which usually lasted 15-25 minutes. It doesn’t take too much oil to make skin pleasantly slick, just make sure you don’t put too much on, or it won’t absorb properly into the skin. However, if you do have too much oil, you can always wipe it away with a cloth once the massage is finished or go hop in the shower with your partner to rinse off.

This product is worth investing in if you like nicely scented massage oils that aren’t overpowering and last well. I’m lusting after the other eight scents right now, and really wish that Shunga offered a sample pack of all the different oils. I’m also going to be checking out more of their products in the future, and will be buying more of this oil when I eventually run out!

I give it 5 paws up out of five!

Does an artificial vagina need lubing?

An artificial vagina is a device designed to give males sexual pleasure when a woman is not available by emulating the warmth and sensation of a female genitalia. However, it is made of unnatural materials like silicone, latex, rubber and plastic. So to answer the question whether a rubber vagina needs lubing or not, it does. Unless of course, you want to run the risk of burning your man part while doing do the deed.

If a silicone vagina is made of unnatural materials, how can it deliver pleasure to a man?

An fake pussy is specially designed to be a substitute for the real thing. This means that it can look and feel like the real female orifice, which is warm, soft and snug. So by using a pocket pussy, you can still achieve orgasm without the actual help of a woman.

Another great thing about a vagina toy is that it can be used to treat or to put it more accurately, ‘train’ a man with premature ejaculation problems to last longer. This means to say that a rubber vagina is a practical device for men of all ages.

Aside from that, couples can also use an artificial vagina. For example, if the man takes so much time ejaculating, it can be hard for the woman. But if they use a fake pussy, the woman won’t need to exert too effort to get the man to be ready for their sexual encounter. What’s more, it can be quite useful if sex in not an option for the couple because of pregnancy, illness or menstruation.

But to ensure immense pleasure, while avoiding any pain, you need to make sure the device is well-lubricated before use. This is because an artificial vagina can’t produce natural lubrication, which means that you could get hurt due to friction.

Although a vagina toy may be specifically created to look and feel like the real thing, the materials used to make it are unnatural, thus the need for lubrication.

In case you are wondering what quality fake pussies are made of, read on.

Soft plastics
A fake pussy can be made of soft plastics or poly vinyl chloride, which are the kind of materials commonly used for sex toys, thanks to their jelly-like characteristic. If you don’t mind the smell of rubber while you’re doing the deed, then this is the fake pussy for you.

Cyberskin
Also known as ultra realistic or futurotic material, cyberskin is a mixture of silicone, PVC and other patented materials. This means that if a rubber vagina is made of this, any man using it will like he is doing the real deal because the device is highly and has a natural feel. However, sex toys made of cyberskin need special care and attention because of its porous nature.

Rubber
Rubber or elastic hydrocarbon polymer is a material that is highly flexible and resilient. It’s also quite durable, making it ideal for the creation of your favorite artificial vagina, a product that is often used vigorously. Extreme care should also be given to any device made of this material because it is porous in nature.

Latex
This flexible material is made natural rubber derived from plants. However, some people are allergic to the feel of latex on their skin.

Plants
There are fruits and vegetables with flesh-like textures, which is why they are used fake pussies. Aside from that, they are widely available and are quite inexpensive, making them ideal as male masturbators. Some of the plants used as improvised vaginas include banana skins, cucumbers and papayas.

No matter the kind of artificial vagina you use, it is important to keep it well-lubricated to achieve intense pleasure all throughout.

Lovehoney’s Sqweel 2

The Squeel 2 is a weird looking toy, there’s no getting around this, so I thought I’d get it out of the way at the start of this review. This is what you would get if an arcade game character, a water wheel, and a futuristic sex toy had a pink and white (or pink and black) baby. If you like your sex toys to be unique and look as though they’d be Tank Girl’s first choice for jacking off, this is definitely for you.

While I haven’t tried the original Sqweel, the Sqweel 2 packaging boasts that it has more power than the original, has 10 ‘tongues’ made of silicone rather than a porous material, and has ‘exciting flicker mode’. I’m glad that I’m review this and not the original, as a Sqweel with less power than this would make me a very sad and probably orgasm-less Pixel.

The sound of the Sqweel is a bit whiny. It’s also fairly loud, to the point that I’d want the bedroom door closed as well as music playing to cover the sound of it if I had to worry about housemates. When I’m just using it by myself, I grab my sound cancelling headphones and use either porn or music to drown out the whine. This may be because of the
There are variable speeds, 3 of them, and you are able to change the direction the Sqweel spins as well as activate a ‘flicker mode’. (Am I the only one who feels like this is sounds like a glitchy version of ‘stealth mode’? You’d be ninja-ing along, when all of a sudden, your camouflage flashes off, then on again?) I usually only use the third speed, and very rarely mess around with the flicker mode. There’s a pause in the flicking that just ends up annoying me, rather than getting me off. I also don’t ever change the direction of the tongues. It just feels weird and uncomfortable to me to have it rotating the opposite way.

The tongues are really pink. I don’t think my picture conveys just how violently, pepto pink they are. They’re silicone and have some seriously drag to them. It’s not as much drag as, say, kitty tongue, but you’re going to want to use a fair bit of lube with this to make your clit and labia not feel abused. I prefer to use a thicker lube with the Sqweel 2, and applied it to my clit and labia before I even turned on the toy. Sliquid Sassy worked well for me, but if you prefer a thinner lube, any water based one will do!

Cleaning is a bit of a pain in the butt. Lube and fluids get all over and in this thing, and having to do a thorough clean up after each use is a must. You have to break down the Sqweel to clean it, and wipe the case down really well because you’ll have spattered stuff all up in that. Luckily, opening the case is easy. You just slide the locking mechanism on the side, pop it apart, and pull out the rotating bit. You have to wipe the inside down, as it’s not sealed, and you don’t want to corrode the batteries by accident. (The batteries, by the way, are 3 AAAs.) The tongue part can be cleaned the normal way-10% bleach, soap and water, or boiling.

I’ve heard horror stories of the Sqweel ripping stray pubes out, and I can neither confirm or deny this, as I like to keep things waxed or well trimmed, and wasn’t willing to go for the disco bush look just to try to dispel that particular sex toy urban myth. I didn’t have any issues with the tongues grabbing at my outer labia piercings either-I have 4, and they have curved barbells in them, for frame of reference.

This doesn’t feel like oral sex to me, but then, I don’t feel like anything can actually compare to having your partner going down on you. Sex toys ARE NOT replacements for humans. Seriously. They’re not your ‘battery operated boyfriend’ or ‘teehee, going to replace hubby’, they’re toys. (Sorry, pet peeve!) That being said, it does feel really good. I was honestly a bit shocked that I was able to orgasm from using the Sqweel, as I’m not normally able to orgasm from oral sex. I need either penetration or vibration to get off.

When I use a vibrator, I tend to press it against my clit, and the pressure seems to help get me off faster. With the Sqweel, I can’t do that. If I press it against me too hard, it makes the engine whine and slow down, which is the exact opposite of what I want it to do. However, the sensations from the tongues against my clit were fast/strong enough to.

I offered to try this out on my boyfriend’s cock, but he took one took at the tongues spinning and started laughing hysterically, so you’ll have to go elsewhere to find a male perspective on the Sqweel, sorry.

Overall, this is a cool toy to add to your collection. Sure, it’s not going to work for everyone, but not all toys do. If you’re looking for something that’s sorta similar to oral sex, you can try this out, but I maintain that it’s not the same. It does, however, feel fucking awesome in it’s own way.